If you want to know what real happiness looks like, surrender your life to God. Let HIM direct your paths.
Take it from me, you don't have to be perfect, but over time you will come to realize that with IN God's circle, you have comfort and life more abundantly. It's not about what you can get physically or materially. And, I know you THINK you know what I'm talking about, but until you decide that GOD comes first, and work toward HIS Will for you, you don't. You have to find that place where God can use you and LET HIM.
That is the start.
You have to determine to KEEP letting Him use you, and give HIM all the credit for doing so, before you can SEE what it is that you are looking at.
I see things so different now than even two or three years ago...and over time, I am even more content and at peace with myself and the world around me. Yes, there will always be those who make life harder than it has to be.
It's like brother Johnny said in his sermon last night, "Darkness CANNOT penetrate the light unless you refuse to BE light." I don't know how to explain it better than that. I know you believe, and I know you have chosen to be a child of God. Because of this, He is going to be throwing things at you until you notice and take action toward HIM. Some of it is not going to be easy to deal with.
I don't want you to have to go through that, but I pray that if/when you do, you end up realizing and grabbing hold to what I have.
1 Corinthians 13
1 Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal.
2 And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing.
3 And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.
4 Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,
5 Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil;
6 Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth;
7 Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.
8 Charity never faileth: but whether there be prophecies, they shall fail; whether there be tongues, they shall cease; whether there be knowledge, it shall vanish away.
9 For we know in part, and we prophesy in part.
10 But when that which is perfect is come, then that which is in part shall be done away.
11 When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.
12 For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known.
13 And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity.