Hagar's Shame

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Genesis 16:
4 And he went in unto Hagar, and she conceived: and when she saw that she had conceived, her mistress was despised in her eyes.

When Hagar conceived, she thought she was better than Sarai. She thought that Abram would favor her because of the child.

Abram, however, was a respecter of the law, and of his wife, Sarai. As any good patriarch of a people does, he provided and cared for those who were following him and serving him. He had no other feelings for Hagar, except that she was honored as the biological mother of his child.

Hagar, on the other hand (just like many women do with a man they have slept with) wanted more than she was allotted. She became contentious toward Sarai. She practically dared Sarai to discipline her for it.

Genesis 16:
5 And Sarai said unto Abram, My wrong be upon thee: I have given my maid into thy bosom; and when she saw that she had conceived, I was despised in her eyes: the LORD judge between me and thee.

Sarai realized her mistake quickly. Not only did she recognize it, she took responsibility for it. She confessed her despair to Abram as if she had committed a sin that she knew she had to pay for (which, she had).

She was probably also looking for reassurance that Abram's feelings toward her had not changed, and that she was still held in high esteem by him.

Sarai also respected her station in life as being the weaker vessel, commanded to follow her husband's lead, as he was in the place of authority granted by God in her life. She loved her husband deeply. However, I believe she had just learned her lesson in placing the laws of man above God's plan.


Genesis 16:
6 But Abram said unto Sarai, Behold, thy maid is in thy hand; do to her as it pleaseth thee. And when Sarai dealt hardly with her, she fled from her face.

Abram confirmed to her that she was still the mistress of the household, and in his heart. She had not lost his respect for her station in his life. He told her that Hagar was her maid, nothing more, and that whatever she decided to do about the problem between the two he would respect.

Sarai took the opportunity to show no mercy toward Hagar's insubordination.

Abram's failure to defend her no doubt shamed her, as well as angered her, so that she decided to run away.

How many times in your life have you made a horrible mistake for which you were ashamed and thought that running away would solve your problems?

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